Posted: Jan 14, 2000
I have been pondering the drastically important question of why people in the 1900s -- or whatever ancient arcane time it was -- called a toilet a "privy", especially since they all knew it was a toilet.
Here are two theories about the origin of the term:
1. Way back before plumbing and Super Mario Bros., people used to have to dig holes in the bushes so they could crap in peace. Privet bushes were favoured toilet bushes since their leaves were well-adapted to the task of wiping oneself after a good session in what came to be known as the "privey".
2. Purging oneself, being the solemn occasion that it is, is a time of great communion with the forces of nature, as well as a time of great honesty. Either that turd is staying in there forever or it's coming out now! To shield the general populace from the hideous collection of curses, yells, screams and insults that would inevitably ensue, an enclosed chamber was developed, which held the toilet itself and whatever other luxuries the folks of the time could afford. The name "privy" reflects the nature of this chamber as being privy to the angry ramblings of a constipated colonialist.
No puns intended.
D.